Dreading Dread

I became familiar with dread as a child. I’d had a very difficult time adjusting when my family moved to Connecticut in the middle of my third-grade year. From then on, every time the calendar turned to August and the school year loomed ahead of me, a feeling grew in the pit of my stomach that I came to know as dread. It didn’t matter that I liked school or even that I made good grades. I dreaded it. And not only did I dread the prospect of a new school year, I came to dread the dread I knew I would inevitably feel!

From time to time, I’ve toyed with the idea of writing a book entitled, If I Knew Then What I Almost Know Now, that would cover various lessons I’ve learned along the way. Because of those childhood experiences, I’ve wondered if dread might make for a worthwhile chapter. I really do wish that I’d known then what I’ve learned since (actually, change that to what I’m still learning). For now, I’ll keep it short and simple by focusing on a single verse, Proverbs 1:33: “But whoever listens to me will dwell secure and will be at ease, without dread of disaster.”

Let me point out a few things that I’ve found helpful. First, whenever a verse starts with “but” or “therefore” it’s important to look at what those words refer to. In this case the “but” signifies a contrast between two categories of people described in the preceding verse—“the simple” and “fools.” Things don’t go well for them. The simple are killed and the fools are destroyed. But it’s not just what happens to them that matters, it’s why it happened. The simple were killed because they turned away. The fools were destroyed because they were complacent. So, note to self: avoid being classified as either simple or a fool. Don’t turn away; don’t become complacent. Neither approach gets you where you want to go.

So what’s the alternative? Back to verse 33. The way to avoid falling into those two categories is to listen, but not just listen to anyone, listen to “me.” And since this statement is in Proverbs, a book in the Bible, we know it’s about listening to wisdom, to wisdom personified, to the Lord. That’s the who and the what we’re meant to listen to. And in contrast to the simple and fools who end up being killed and destroyed, those who listen to him will “dwell secure and will be at ease, without dread of disaster.” Isn’t that so much more reassuring, peace-giving, and satisfying then constantly dreading the next disaster?

Now let’s take a minute to dip below the surface. We now know that listening to wisdom—to the Lord—is the way to go. We know that blessings will come our way as a result and that it even has implications for our experiences of dread. Let’s unpack some of that a bit more. For instance, it shows us that:

• The Lord wants us to listen to him. More than simply have a relationship with him, he wants us to relate to him. In healthy relationships, people don’t just hear each other, they listen to each other. When we listen to the Lord, we’ll come to know him as he really is, high and exalted, yet tender and caring. We’ll come to know his character and know that we can trust him.
• The Lord cares about us. He does not want us to go the way of the simple or the fool, to turn away or to become complacent, to end up as they do. Rather, he wants us to come to him, the one who is life-giving, to listen to him and enjoy the benefits of doing so, not only in this life, but in the life to come.
• The Lord understands our plight. The Lord knows not only that disasters are a reality we live with, but that we have good reason to dread them. He knows that even better than we do, because he knows the perfect world he originally created. And that’s precisely why Jesus came. He came to restore what was broken. Through his life, death, resurrection, and ascension, he came to make possible what was impossible. And only because of that are we able to listen to the Lord and enjoy the blessings of doing so.

There’s much more that could be said, but what this verse reveals about who God is and what he’s done for us grounds us, centers us, and helps us when dread has taken hold. As I look back on my childhood experience now, what made all the difference, what the Lord impressed on me—even back then—was the same as the message of this verse. The Lord is there. Or more accurately, the Lord is here. Here with us. There with you. Here with me. If you don’t get anything else, get that. It’s not first and foremost about the circumstances that are causing our dread. It’s first and foremost about the one who is with you in the dread.

I was not alone walking into that school, that classroom, that playground, that cafeteria. He was with me. He was listening to me. He was sympathizing with my weakness. He was giving me strength to do what I needed to do. And, in retrospect, I can see that by his grace he was helping me to listen to him and to believe that he was with me—always. I needed to experience him being with me and learn that lesson time and time again until, one day in college, it finally dawned on me that September had come, and I hadn’t even noticed.

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